Just Press Start

Recently, I was working with a lovely client, who came to me for help with the depression she was feeling after her youngest child left for college.  As a single mom, she was truly experiencing an “empty nest” since she was literally home alone after her daughter went away to school.  This was a radical change in her lifestyle since her kids had been a daily presence for over 20 years.  Now, what was she to do all alone?  In expressing her sense of loss and loneliness, she admitted that one of the hardest things she’d had to face was the dishwasher.  She told me that with a veiled smile, but she was completely serious.  The fact that it took her days to fill up the dishwasher with enough dishes to justify running the wash cycle really brought home to her how different her life was now.  All she could feel was sadness and isolation.  As we talked some more, I tried to help her turn that narrative around.  First, I pointed out what a fantastic job she’d done as a single mom, sending all three of her children off to great schools.  They were successful and independent and had thrived under her good parenting.  Then, I suggested that she turn this sense of loss into a feeling of empowerment.  She had earned a break!  I asked her what she might like to do now that she no longer had the daily obligation of tending to children.  At first, she couldn’t think of a thing, but as we chatted further, it came to her that what she would love to do is travel to some exotic place, maybe even sign up for a mission trip, so that she could help others and see the world at the same time.  I heartily encouraged her to do just that and I saw her face light up and her mood change dramatically.  She had a new purpose and a new goal!  She realized that life does go on and there was a lot more living she had to do.  I was thrilled to see the transformation in her energy!  Until… I noticed a shadow once again cloud her face and I asked her what had brought her down.  She sighed, “The dishwasher…”  Such a seemingly silly thing, but it still served as a reminder of what she’d lost.  I looked at her with a smile and said, “Just press start.’  She looked at me without expression for a moment, then burst out laughing.  “You’re right,” she replied.  “That’s exactly what I need to do!” 


If you're feeling at a loss...in transition...don't know which way to turn...come in for a chat!  It's a great place to start....
Hugs!!
Elizabeth
SageCrossings.com

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